Tag Archives: realtionships

The Challenge…

5 Sep


Ultimatum: a final proposition, condition, or uncompromising demand; especially: one whose rejections will end/severance relations and cause a resort to force or other direct action.

Living this “thin lifestyle” takes follow through, I constantly give myself mini challenges otherwise known as ultimatums. Being the advanced procrastinator I am I set small do or die check point for myself just to keep order and discipline in my life. Howbeit, telling myself if I don’t run at least 12 miles this week I can’t have a real dinner, if I don’t meet all my deadlines by Friday then no dates Saturday or I won’t purchase any shoes if I don’t reach my monthly financial goal.

Ultimatums may seem like a bad thing but its how we manage our lives, as well as decide to take new paths and let some things go that isn’t resulting in success. Ultimatums keep you on your toes and off your flabby butt.

Here’s the thing ultimatums only work if you weight each proposition, understand the ramifications and stick to your final term.

On the topic of love, dating, relationship or whatever you want to call it, confused lovers use ultimatums as their “go-to” when they feel burdensome (I say bulky) with their complacent lover. For example, a close friend of mine that has been in a relationship for about 3 years now ready to get married but don’t want to be the one to pop the question or feel as though they are pressuring their mate into a commitment they aren’t ready for.

Side note: I don’t know why my friends come to me for dating advice but they do. I keep telling them, don’t ask me ask your fat friend!

My friend is ready to give a marry-me-by-said-date-or-move-out ultimatum to their spouse. This is why my friend is an idiot and most of you out there desperately single or in loveless marriages that cause you to over eat which is the reason why he/she won’t touch you.

Ultimatums don’t work! …Unless you’re me.

3 Steps to Getting What You Want with Threats.

Scale: When giving your partner an ultimatum you need to weight the condition of what you’re propositioning. Will you be okay if the answer isn’t what you want to hear, is this the best way to get what you desire and does your wants cause for this resort?

Follow Through: Be confident in receiving a no. That means in order to stand by your conditions you have to know there is a great chance in not getting a yes. Don’t back down, have your exit strategy and let he/she know this is it. Ultimatum only work once so if you renig then you can never use it again, you won’t be taken seriously.

Results May Vary: Know there will be resentment in whatever answer you receive because they were forced into making a move. Know that most people do the opposite of what you want when given an ultimatum. Know that when you give an ultimatum the ball isn’t in your court anymore and the receiver has all the power.


Shut Your Mouth & Your Fat A**!

10 Jul

You know how when people start a new diet/workout they exclaim every new found skinny happening from trips to the gym, weekly scale readings and new clothes purchases for their new waist size? Yes, I do it too! You ever noticed those same people never fill your timeline with the late night pantry raids, binge eating or skipped trips to “this imaginary gym that you never see them at when you’re there?” I’m excluding myself this time. Well that same selective discretion should be help for relationships.

One of my three rules to dating; Rule Number 3: Shut Your Mouth is something I wish most people would live by. However, like my wish for people not to eat bread in public that’s a fat ship that has sunk.

It’s kind of like brussel sprouts, for some reason we all had this great distain for the edible buds mainly from televisions and other fat kids telling us veggies are gross. Though, upon trying them for yourself you realize wow, these are good and good for you.

That’s what I am dealing with now. Friends will have you hating their significant other whole hearted based solely on the stories they tell.

I have a friend that has been in a relationship for about six months and since day one he has been telling me every annoying, sad and ridiculous incident going on in his relationship to the point that whenever we are all together I just have the instant attitude towards this guy.

It’s serious; I ignore him, talk over him, purposely call him the wrong name every time and take subliminal shots at him every chance I get. Why you ask? Because my friend has only told me the bad about him so that is what I have based my judgment on.

I mean your friends will have you hating people you never even heard of all out of loyalty. Think about it; how many people are you all too ready to pulverize like cheap ice cream over things your friends have said and you never even met them?

For instance, over the weekend I attended my friend’s birthday celebration and I was beyond excited however the minute the car pulled up and I seen his partner was in the car as well my mood shifted drastically. I had to pop a diet pill (because we all know those are my happy pills nothing say excitement like know you’re burning calories while partying at the same time.)

Here’s the gotcha…

As the night progressed so did the fun and as my friend got plastered off empty alcoholic calories I noticed me and his boyfriend spent a lot of time talking, exchanging jokes and workout tips (oh yeah he’s a working model.) I instantly thought of brussel sprouts.

So the next day when my friend came over to rant yet again I lost it to the effect of I blurted out “the way you complain about this boy one would think your yakkety yak is a form of exercise. I’m not saying but I’m say you’re getting fat.”

Once I explained my problem with him we made up over a nice run at the gym and Sunday’s episode of True Blood.

Moral of the story you can’t disclose all the bad about your relationship nor the good it only build prejudice and make you look like the fatty loser.
Be selective be respectable be thin.

You’re Welcome.

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