I Should Have Just Ate.

13 Nov

During the time I was waiting for internet to be installed in my new apartment I decided to do something productive at the nearby river other than crunches or taunting myself with cooking tutorial videos on my cellular( I watch them outdoors in case I get hungry I just run it off.) I finally finished the worst book of all time!

“Choke” by Chuck Palahniuk

First off, I knew this book didn’t stand a chance when I realized that it wasn’t a guide on quick weight-loss tips. I mean the title is Choke and Palahniuk did write “Fight Club” -did you not see Brad Pit triceps and abs?

Nevertheless, the gist of this garbage is about a sex-addict-pre-med-dropout who fake chokes on food in restaurants to get people to give him money that he use to pay for his psychotic mother’s assistant living. A little off-color but admirable till you actually continue to read. The book switches from the happenings of his atypical hazy childhood where he was psychologically brain screwed by his “mom” to his disgusting sexual compulsive escapades with people in and out of Sexual Addicts Anonymous meetings up to his handling of his out of control and very depressing present day life struggles with his weirdo friends, crappy job, choking scam and caring for his dying mom.

One could imagine that this guy is total porker. I know if my life was as bad only joy there would be is to devour everything in sight.

I know this book had good intentions to be great but it just wasn’t. Palahniuk is a very outrageous and loquacious storyteller yet, with all those words he still manages to write a whole lot of nothing. The story was all over the place, too descriptive in unnecessary places and not enough in desired places. It didn’t build, it just went on and on with no purpose. I didn’t get a sense if these people was pretty, thin or interesting. Even with the (foreseen) but smart twist at the end went unenjoyable because I just wanted to get the book finished.

Originally, I seen this book as a letdown being that it wasn’t a diet book however, I did manage to lose a little weight with the meals I missed by falling asleep in the middle of reading.

I started reading this book earlier in the year but it was so tedious to complete and I’m one of those people who can’t start another book till one is finished so I’ve just been buying pretty books that hasn’t been read. At least they look great on my new bookshelves.

The next book I’m reading is going to be something vapid but real. You know, something about skinny people problems.


9 Responses to “I Should Have Just Ate.”

  1. Erin November 13, 2012 at 6:39 pm #

    Are you cereal! I LOVED Choked!

    • BougieHippie November 14, 2012 at 12:38 am #

      You’re the second person to say that. What exactly did you like about the book?

      • Erin November 15, 2012 at 9:44 pm #

        It was twisted and sexual

      • BougieHippie November 16, 2012 at 6:35 am #

        As well as boring and confusing.

      • Erin November 16, 2012 at 6:23 pm #

        But to be fair don’t you think your difficulty with attending may be correlated with your meager intake you skinny bastard you 😉

      • BougieHippie November 16, 2012 at 10:21 pm #

        True. However most importantly you think I’m skinny. You sure know how to sweet talk a guy.

  2. Antonio Maurice Daniels November 14, 2012 at 4:01 pm #

    Very good analysis. I will have to grab a copy of this book and see if I arrive at similar or divergent conclusions.

    • BougieHippie November 14, 2012 at 8:47 pm #

      Please let me know! The book is about 15 bucks paperback. I think I’m bias b/c I hate paperback books. I feel poor reading them.

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