Front Fat vs Back Fat

3 Nov

I’m going to put this plain and simple. Spanx for men are ridiculous, lazy and stupid.

Personally I’m an abs man; I am not attracted to pregnant guys. Sorry but I’m not into fetish.

It’s becoming more prevalent that in this instant gratification society people are always looking for an easy, fast way out if things. Exercise is one of those things people try to fast track. I was in the mall Monday doing what I love the most, shopping for designer underwear it was then I seen a sign for men Spanx.

After my initial feel of disgust then laughter I began to wonder; who are these men that are this lazy and self-conscious to purchase these things. I am aware that not all men are a 32 waist with washboard abs but whatever happened to giving a stint at the gym the old college try?

I ask this because one of the things that I work the hardest on is my abs. No matter how many days of crunches and calorie counting if I miss one day of abs workout I look like Beyonce’s fake baby bump.

Nevertheless, I have never resulted to buying a girdle. I can’t imagine meeting someone taking them home for a night of tawdry calorie burning and as they undressed it’s like opening a can of biscuits. How embarrassing.

I was reading last month’s issue of Details magazine and I ran across an article about how the butt in the new abs. I agree! I like a guy who butt is high and tight. Not jiggly, not flat or full of dimples.

My butt is something that I have never had to work on if anything I have always tried to lose it. Not until yesterday, I renewed my gym membership because the summer is over and it’s getting too cold to run and workout outdoors. As I was in working out I noticed that a lot of guys were doing squats, isometrics, the stairs and lunges.

I began to think; is abs the new ass?

Date wise I would say yes I do like a guy with nice gluts. Pop culture wise I’ve noticed our favorite celebrities are celebrated for their derrière. Not to mention the rise in butt plumping whether it’s cosmetic surgery or helpful undergarments.

I love buying underwear mainly because I like the way I fill them out. So for those of you who can’t seem to develop a six pack maybe you should focus on your fanny.

Before I give you tips on how to maintain a desired tush here are some tips to keeping your stomach in check.

Stay away from sugar: Sugar goes right to the stomach.

Strengthen your core: Take up yoga or T’ai chi.

Don’t be delusional: Those “helpful” undergarment only hide the problem not get rid of the problem also, it only stops the jiggle people still can see you’re huge.

Ways for the maximum gluteus maximums.

Abs workouts: The smaller your waist is the bigger your butt looks.

Don’t be a fat ass: Take the stairs.

Best booty regimes: Frog jumps, clenches and running.

I know we all just want to look great in our clothing. That’s the whole purpose for the Spanx, right? Let me just say this- who cares what you are wearing if you look like a T-Rex in it. Get off your butt and move around!


6 Responses to “Front Fat vs Back Fat”

  1. VIVA.V November 3, 2011 at 6:26 pm #

    Spanx for men hey?? G*R*O*S*S!! Whatever happened to the good old days when people actually popped over to the gym and gave it a go for a bit…even for just a minute? Instant gratification is even more so nauseating. Everything is quite literally a quick, grab and go take-away bubble. Sadly, nothing of good quality : ( And on another note, nice one on joining the gym beautiful : D xx

  2. Amanda November 3, 2011 at 8:35 pm #

    this is outrageous! whaaat??! I don’t think any spanx can hide a man’s pooch…daang??! yea…what about exercise?great tips!


  3. johnnys504 November 3, 2011 at 11:08 pm #

    LMAO! Spanx for men is hilarious. i do know a few guys that wear it. but i never got how it actually worked.but i’ve resorted to running 4 times a week to get rid of lil tummy.

  4. Nekiah November 3, 2011 at 11:27 pm #

    I could not even imagine a man wearing Spanx! I wear them! Many super thin celebrities wear them so they are not just a “FAT” people thing! Kiah

  5. Aria November 5, 2011 at 4:24 pm #

    Spanx for men? My golly, what’s happening to this world?

  6. kristina@beancakes ★ November 8, 2011 at 10:02 am #

    oh wow this takes the cake ~ spanx for men now? i never believed in the idea of spanx for women much less for men ~ crazy i tell ya!!

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